fear

fear is what often keeps people from living their everyday lives. fear is that knot in your stomach that never seems to quite go away, it just lingers there waiting to present itself again. fear is being afraid that someone, yet again, will let you down. i can honestly say, i have lived most of my life in fear. fear of being rejected, or fear of being disappointed or the fear of letting someone who hurt you back in. and yes, i know people say you cannot live your life in fear, but some days it is just inescapable. some days there is no way if getting around it and all you feel is fear, regardless of what your fearing, fear is present. i often find myself second guessing my choices in life because i fear that it will be wrong, or i fear that it won't end well... its something i am guilty of on more than one occasion, and today i felt that fear of disappointment creep right back in, creating that all to familiar knot in my stomach, and it hit me, after almost nineteen years of life, that there will never be an escape to that feeling of fear. it will always be there regardless of how much you try to avoid it, or persuade yourself your are not fearful, you are going to be, in time. so lesson for today, embrace the fear, and power through it. take it one day at a time when it gets rough, you will make it through. and yes that fear will pop back up again in time, but you always will have the fact that you beat it the time before to get you through it the next time.